But Every Time I Wake
by I'm4realBtman
Summary: We all have dreams and wishful thinking. What do the agents at Phoenix dream about? This is just a little something that I thought up and decided to put on paper (or computer). Rated M only because of my paranoia XD
1. MacGyver

I feel her hand enclosed in my own as we run playfully down the beach. Nikki follows me with a huge grin adorning her beautiful face. While I know that she is mindful of her surroundings, her beautiful eyes are focused on nothing but me. I watch her out of the corner of my eye as we frolic down the sandy scape. Her golden hair is slightly wind tousled and slick with the salty sea water that we had been swimming in earlier that evening. Her fair skin has a tan that lends her bikini clad body a natural, golden glow. I am so engrossed in her beauty, in the curve of her smile, the twinkle of her eye, that I lose control of my feet. My long legs wrap around each other and I suddenly find my lanky frame falling to the ground, pulling my lover down with me. Nikki falls on top of my chest; arms braced on either side of my neck. I gently raise my hand up to brush a piece of hair behind her ear, my eyes never leaving hers and a smile resting easily on my lips. As I brush the one piece back, another of her long locks falls, tickling my nose and making me sneeze. I smile wider as she lets out a sickly sweet laugh at my expense. We lay like that for a few more seconds before she plops her curvaceous body down to my right. I reach out and pull her body closer until her sun warmed skin touches mine. I cradle her in my arms and she immediately returns the loving embrace. We lay like that for hours; holding each other securely, arms intertwined, in the warm glow of the setting sun, feeling the leftover heat from the sand beneath us. My eyes slip closed as I lay there in the sand, Nikki held tight in my arms.

But when I wake, there is no beach. There is no warm sand tickling my back. There is no salty sea breeze to entertain my senses. And worse of all, there is no Nikki in my arms. A pillow is the only thing that lays beside me in my oversized bed. There is room for two but there hasn't been a second person since her. I have these dreams sometimes. Where things turned out differently. Where the love of my life didn't try to end the world. Where we stayed together and furthered our relationship. Dreams where I could hold her in my arms one last time. The problem is that I have these wonderful dreams, but every time I wake… Nikki's gone and I find myself so unbelievably alone.

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	2. Jack Dalton

As I reload my gun, I glance up at my partner. Sarah doesn't notice, which makes sense because she is defending the military outpost that we are stationed at. As I reach into my cargo pants pocket for a new magazine, my eyes travel over my partner. Her dark hair is falling out of the bun that she spent almost an hour on this morning. Small ringlets of baby hair frame her freckled face. Her chocolate eyes rove the expanse before her as she seeks out possible enemies. I smile as her lips quirk up into that frustrated smile that I love so much. By now, I have put the magazine back into my rifle and I creep over to the broken window sill that we are shooting from. As I crawl past her, I gently bump her shoulder playfully. She glances at me out of the corner of her eye and smiles; a real smile this time. Her eyes crinkle at the corners and her pearly whites make an appearance. I grin at her before getting my head off of the love of my life and back on the situation at hand. The rest of the battle flashes before me and before I know it, we won the fight and we can finally put down our smoking weapons. As I sling my rifle over my shoulder, two arms wrap around me and I look down to see Sarah hugging me. I return the action and we stay like that for a long time. We begin to sway to invisible music and pretty soon, we find ourselves dancing the stress of the battle away. I twirl her around and although she isn't in some sweeping dress, she still manages to take my breath away. I pull her into a dip and we hold the pose. Her weight hanging in my arms while her slender fingers stay wrapped around my neck. We may not be at a ball, but this moment is the highlight of my entire dancing career, if not of my life. We stare into each other's eyes, brown on brown swirling together and becoming the sole focus for the both of us. I close my eyes for one second, the get a piece of dust out of my eye…

But when I open my eyes again, I am not in a war zone (thank goodness). I am not in my ACUs. And there is no woman in my arms. I am dressed up in a tuxedo standing in the pews of a cozy little church. Beside me stands my partner; however, it is not the beautiful Sarah Adler. Beside me is Angus MacGyver, my most recent partner. He lays a comforting hand on my shoulder as I stand as still as a statue. I accept the support as I watch Sarah walk down the aisle with her new husband toward their car and a wonderful life. The problem with my daydreams is that they show me what could have been, what I wish could have been. I enjoy every moment that I imagine, but every time I wake, I realize that my chance is gone and I can never get her back.


	3. Riley Davis

I lay on my new suede couch with a mystery novel perched in my hands. The sun's golden rays are shining through the French doors of my contemporary styled living room. The plush grey blanket that is draped over my outstretched pajama clad legs billows slightly as the A/C kicks on. My hair, which is pulled up into a messy ponytail, tickles my neck as a figure walks past me. I glance over my shoulder as my mom hurries past me and towards the kitchen. Her caramel hair is pulled up into a low ponytail similar to mine and she is wearing a magenta blouse with black capris. The clip clop of her heels echoes as she walks to the fridge to grab a coke. I smile as she notices my staring and grabs me some cold pizza out of the fridge. She walks over and drops heavily into the silver arm chair across form the couch that I am lounging on and tosses me the container of pizza. I immediately dig into the delicious slice of heaven as my mom informs me that she is heading out to spend the day with a nice guy that she met in a bar the other day. My pink lips form a smile, despite my mouthful of pizza, and I give her a thumbs up to signal that I understood and good for her. She laughs and rolls her eyes in mock frustration. We sit, enjoying the sun's rays, in silence for a few minutes. My mom suddenly glances down at her watch and rises. She grabs her coat and brushes a kiss on my cheek as she walks out the door. I smile and go back to the novel that lies on my lap. My eyes skim the page, absorbing the words. I am enthralled as the girl in the book finds herself part of a secret organization in which she works with the stereotypical 'brains' and 'brawn'. I laugh at how unreasonable the story is, but continue reading (I even put myself in her shoes a few times). After a while of reading, I feel my eyes drifting closed; the warm sun, a full stomach, and the lilac air freshener all combined to lull me to sleep.

I wake up to some fight a few cells down. I look down and I am no longer laying on a sued couch. I am laying on the lumpy mattress of the bottom bunk of a prison bed. Over my legs is a thin set of dirty sheets, not a comfy cotton blanket. My mom isn't going to walk in and tell me about her date. My prison guard is going to come in and tell me to keep my hands where he can see them. I wish that I could just go back to sleep and live in the world that I had created. Sadly, I knew that this, this prison life, was reality. I hold my head in my hands as I try to remember what it was like to live outside of these stone walls. I briefly remember the dream that I had had. I can practically feel my mother's presence beside me. But every time I wake, I find no one in my cell but the lonely company of me, myself, and I.

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 **This takes place shortly before Riley is recruited by Phoenix and when she is still in jail.**

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